Father's Day: Tom Gilbert’s vow to baby boy

Tom Gilbert is inspired by his late grandfather and baby boy to be the best person and father he can be, demonstrating the qualities he hopes would make them both proud.

The Dolphins NRL player, who was named team captain before a ruptured pectoral muscle ended his season in May, will celebrate his first Father’s Day on Sunday, September 7.

Son Luca was born in December last year and his arrival instantly changed Tom’s perspective on life.

“It’s been a full 180, if I’m being honest, in such a good way too,” he says.

“The one thing that I’ve noticed instantly is you start living for something much more important than yourself. Because of that, it makes things easier in terms of going to work each day, and enjoying downtime is much easier and more enjoyable than it ever has been before because I’ve got this little guy by my side.”

Tom has suffered season-ending injuries three seasons in a row, but the silver lining this time around has been that he’s had time to enjoy precious moments with his baby boy.

“I’m missing another year, and that’s been so difficult, but my life at home has been amazing. It’s been the best to come home to. That is 100 per cent because of my wife (Maddie) and because of my bub,” he says.

“That’s why I’ve got a reason to wake up each and every day, and at least go and have a crack. I just think of what he would think of me, if he was older … what kind of person I want him to be.

“Just like footy, you’ve kind of got to set a little bit of a standard. I just want him to know that I’m not giving up and I’m trying really hard.

“He helps that by making it enjoyable at home, but also when I’m away from him I do think if him, what kind of dad he’d be proud of.

“I had 10 weeks off when I couldn’t really train, which is a long time, but I got to spend so much time with him which I’m super grateful for.”

Tom draws inspiration from the man who had the biggest influence on his life – showing him how to be a good father – his late grandfather.

“He just was selfless. He had a hard end to his life … for 20 years, he battled Parkinson’s Disease but the effort and the selflessness he had in being there not just for his kids but for his grandchildren was second to none,” Tom explains.

“That inspired me a lot to not just be a great person, but great father with all the sacrifices he made and all the little things he did for me in my life.

“That really inspired me, with my injuries and my troubles, to just get on with it and try my best. That’s, sure as hell, what he did.”

And if he’s needed further guidance and inspiration, he hasn’t had to look too hard.

“I’m so lucky. We’ve got so many great dads at the Dolphins that have given me advice and definitely made life easier, when he (Luca) has reached a milestone or had a bad night’s sleep,” Tom says.

“The constant one that a lot of parents have told me is to not wish for them to grow up (too quickly). That’s been the biggest one for me, I reckon.

“So much can change in a few days with a baby, so I’ve just learnt to really enjoy those moments and be present as much as I can in his life because of that advice.”

Tom is relishing his new and most important role, as father, but admits there are some aspects that have taken him by surprise.

“You’re never prepared for it. I talk about, you live for someone else. I was a person who liked a lot of time to himself, liked those moments, and that changes. Nowadays, if I want to have those moments I want to do it with him. That’s the biggest change in my life,” he reveals.

“The funny thing I found was how easy that was. You think it’s a difficult process, but it becomes automatic overnight that you’ve got to put him first in nearly every situation.”

So, what is his advice to other young parents?

“You can’t prepare yourself for what life is like with a kid, as much as people want to tell you. I reckon, don’t be too hard on yourself, especially the mothers. They (people) put an expectation on you, but I look at Maddie and think she’s doing such a wonderful job,” he says.

“So, never be too hard on yourself because you’re learning. Just enjoy it, enjoy the change it brings to your life, embrace it.”