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Survivor shares her story for Sexual Violence Awareness Month

Samford author and survivor advocate Deborah Aldrick will be among the guest speakers at a Moreton Bay Sexual Violence Awareness Month event at Caboolture this month.

Having survived intrafamilial childhood sexual abuse, Deborah plans to share her lived experiences and knowledge she’s gained over the years to help people understand how survivors of childhood sexual abuse struggle throughout their lives when she speaks at Laurel Place’s breakfast at the Caboolture Hub on October 30.

She hopes her story will also give frontline workers an insight into the behaviours of children who are being sexually abused, so future generations of children can get vital support.

“I’ll be talking about how it affected me as a little girl, teenager and into my adulthood,” Deborah says.

“Also about how the person who was supposed to protect me didn’t and how that’s had such a big effect on every aspect of my life.

Life-long impact

“I’ll also discuss how due to my low self-esteem and lack of confidence, I was easily exposed to men who took advantage of me.

“I was pregnant at 18, then became a single mum, letting men from when I was a teenager and into my early 20s disrespect me, and feeling as though I didn’t deserve any better treatment.

“But I could have gone down worse roads with addiction and substance abuse.”

Deborah says victim-survivors’ reactions to their abuse often includes negative and harmful behaviours such as over-working, eating disorders, addiction, people pleasing and falling in with bad crowds, which are all trauma responses.

“If survivors don’t deal with their abuse by getting help and continue to push their pain down, they will end up with things like anxiety, panic attacks, depression and could potentially be involved in domestic violence situations,” Deborah says.

“I became a people pleaser as so many survivors do, because I had a fragile sense of worth, so I relied on other people’s praise to feel good about myself.”

Helping others

She still struggles with her self-confidence at times, but says launching her book, Circling the Wagons, in April was an important step in her healing journey.

“When my book got published, I wanted somewhere for people to reach out to me,” she explains.

“It led to the launch of dragonflyadvocacy.com.au, an anonymous website which is filled with free resources such as links to organisations for survivors.

“There’s also resources for mental health support and suicide prevention, domestic violence support services, child protection education and sexual abuse support, and the wonderful Laurel Place who offer counselling and services against sexual violence, and my site also has blogs survivors may relate to.

“Launching the book and speaking about my experiences has been really good for my self-esteem – for somebody who left school at the end of Grade 10, to be able to rebuild my confidence and find my purpose was amazing.

“My goal is to open up this dialogue, so that other survivors can take the power back that was stolen from them as children.

“And I want to help people identify the signs of abuse.

Stopping the cycle

“That’s my purpose – all I am looking for is to educate the general public and make this something people talk about, so it doesn’t continue to another generation.

“I know this is not a nice subject, but when we don’t speak about it and hide what has happened to a child, this kind of abuse just continues and more lives will be ruined.”

Book your tickets

Jessica Taylor from Laurel Place says the breakfast is a chance to hear from people who are involved in research and from survivors, as well as mingle with people.

“There will be a large police presence and other people from within the industry, but anyone can come along,” Jessica says.

Other speakers include Dr Emily Moir, who will discuss her recent work focusing on preventing the abuse of older adults with projects exploring elder abuse in Queensland, rural and remote Australia, and barriers for older people in reporting experiences of abuse.

Sunshine Coast singer/songwriter Alys Ffion will share her story of recovery from sexual assault through her upcoming album Healing Era

Jessica says there will also be the opportunity for community networking to connect with like-minded individuals, organisations, and allies who are dedicated to creating safer environments for everyone.

Laurel Place, which has a service in Moreton Bay, is a community-based, government-funded, free and confidential organisation that provides counselling, support, information and education relating to sexual violence.

The Sexual Violence Awareness Month breakfast is from 9am-11.30am on Wednesday, October 30 at the Caboolture Hub, Level 1, 4 Hasking St, Caboolture. Click here to book.